Twenty three questions to be answered as an essay each. I hate Soc Sci II! (The exam part only)

Today was our Soc Sci II mid-term exam, and it was badly set because I had an exam yesterday. If you’ve read my previous post, you’d know that I haven’t been gaining that much sleep. So last night, I slept as much as I can. Haha. I was too confident about the exam (SocSciII), because I was expecting that it’d be easy. But it turned out that I was wrong. Huhu

I also attended SOD’s weekly LIFE meeting. I have been attending for about 3x, and I am starting to feel comfortable with the people. Actually, I have met Ate Chrish (the group leader) since my freshman years through Ema. At first, I was attending weekly cell group meetings, but since Chem 27, and afterwards, Zoo 102 and Chem 31, I can’t spend time anymore with the group. But now, since the meeting fitted perfectly to my sched, I can’t let any chance of regaining spiritual strength and meeting Christian friends pass me by. As I have been telling you, my spiritual life is a bit low right now. But hey, not just a bit – it is way down low.

I enjoyed listening to Kuya Carlo’s message about winning souls for Christ, and his side stories about UP life, and other things. He quoted somebody, “The reason why people fear death is because after dying, they would realize that they had not lived at all.” And I was struck right through the heart. I am not afraid of death, but I am afraid of what would happen after death. I am afraid that I have not been living at all – that I am not using this life to do my responsibility as a Christian, that is, to win souls for Christ. How could I be such a hypocrite – professing myself as a Christian, yet not making people feel that Christ has really changed me? How could I be so ungrateful? Selfish? Arrgh. I hate myself.

How I wish I had somebody to talk to about these things.